DO SOMETHING I meant to post this earlier in the week but it got away from me until now, lost in all the stuff I am juggling but this is important and I should have made room for it. In 1993 three teenagers were arrested for murder. Their subsequent conviction and sentencing had more to do with the fact that they listened to heavy metal and read Stephen King novels. They also made the mistake of wearing black. This was Arkansas. Jessie Misskelley Jr got life plus 40. He is mentally handicapped. James Baldwin received life without parole. Damien Echols was sentenced to death. You can read about the whole sorry mess right here. I first heard about the West Memphis Three a few years ago after seeing a link on the Henry Rollins website and I've followed the story ever since. A year or so ago Henry released a CD of Black Flag songs and toured the album to raise money for these guys. Other celebrities do what they can to raise money and awareness. I started reading Margaret Cho's blog about six months ago and was happy to see that she has been asking fans and readers to get in touch with Damien, write him letters and send him books. Death row for a crime he didn't commit. Sentenced to death for being a typical teenager. Unbelievable. So after the stuff that came out about the abuse in Iraqi jails Margaret wrote to Damien and asked him to talk about an average day on death row in an American prison: "Those 15 minute calls to Lorri are the only real conversations I will have in a day. We may talk of Yo Yo Ma (my favorite musician of all time), Deepak Chopra, G.I. Gurdjieff, Balthus, Goya (my favorite artist), Thomas Hardy, dysfunctional families, or we may plan out what we will watch on television together that night. I say this is the only real conversation I will have because there aren't many people you can actually talk to in prison. Your average prisoner has an I.Q. of 80. That's only 10 points above retardation. Most can't even speak English properly, use words they don't know the meaning of in ways that make no sense, or make up their own words. There are no insane criminal genius types in here. No Hannibal Lecters. That's only on television. The vast majority of the people on death row are either mentally retarded or mentally ill. You're not going to find many people who can even follow the same train of thought for very long." "They turn off the lights at 10:30. If you could train yourself to fall asleep the second the lights went off, you're still only going to get 4 and a half hours at the most. You can't sleep straight through though, because you're constantly awakened by slamming doors, schizophrenic inmates screaming, and rats trying to crawl into our bed as you sleep. The rats are fearless. The night before last I was awakened three times by rats crawling across my feet as they tried to reach a pack of crackers I was saving. The little bastards even chewed a hole in one of my good socks. I save my best ones to wear when Lorri comes every Friday, and now there's a hole nibbled in one." You can read the whole letter here. Don't just read this and sigh and think that America is fucked. It is, obviously but get involved anyway. Send some money. Buy a CD. Send a letter. Send a book. Do something. Mike is blogging to: nothing

BURN IT ALL We just rewatched Lost in Translation on DVD. Brought back a bunch of memories from Tokyo. Such a perfect little movie. That scene with Charlotte and the robots should never have been cut out... In my email from Newsnight about the Brit Art bonfire: Does this loss really matter or are we better off without this particular load of "conceptual bullshit"? That made me smile. Burn it all. Mike is blogging to: nothing

FBI ABDUCTS ARTIST, SEIZES ART "Steve Kurtz was already suffering from one tragedy when he called 911 early in the morning to tell them his wife had suffered a cardiac arrest and died in her sleep. The police arrived and, cranked up on the rhetoric of the "War on Terror," decided Kurtz's art supplies were actually bioterrorism weapons. Thus began an Orwellian stream of events in which FBI agents abducted Kurtz without charges, sealed off his entire block, and confiscated his computers, manuscripts, art supplies... and even his wife's body..." The full story is here along with a plea for help. Via Warren. Mike is blogging to: The Land of the (mostly) Free

FALLIBLE I misquoted the movie. Shame on me for not paying attention to such an important piece of art. Do you know what's waiting beyond that beach? Immortality! Take it! It's yours! It's fixable. "Do you know what's waiting beyond that bread? A crumpet! Take it! It's yours!" This is exactly why I bothered with the M.A. I now have a startling ability to add the word 'crumpet' to almost any sentence. For example, "There are no pacts between men and crumpets!" America - I am not explaining what a crumpet is again. You are a sad people and I pity you. You and your twinkies. In other news I just ordered one of these: Mike is blogging to: The Lavigne

"MY HUSBAND IS A HOSTAGE" In a little-noticed development amid Iraq's prison abuse scandal, the U.S. military is holding dozens of Iraqis as bargaining chips to put pressure on their wanted relatives to surrender, according to human rights groups. These detainees are not accused of any crimes, and experts say their detention violates the Geneva Conventions and other international laws. The practice also risks associating the United States with the tactics of countries that it has long criticized for arbitrary arrests. via Boing Boing. Mike is blogging to: Voivod

TAKE IT! So there's that line in Troy: You know what awaits you? Immortality. TAKE IT! It's yours! I have found it to be very adaptable today. This morning to the cat: "You know what awaits you? Cat food. TAKE IT! It's yours!" Talking to myself while looking in the cupboard for lunch: "You know what awaits you? A crumpet. TAKE IT! It's yours!" On the phone to the bank: "You know what awaits you? My soul. TAKE IT! It's yours!" I doubt I'll get bored of this. Mike is blogging to: Bad Religion

SUPER 8 I just got an invite to the premiere for the new James Tully movie. Good music, cocktails and Richard Kern movies tomorrow night. In New York. Where's the teleportation I was promised? Fucking New Labour. Mike is blogging to: Avril Lavigne and with no sense of irony

WORDAGE Blogger tells me that I have written 296,082 words since August 2001. It only seems like 295,082. Mike is blogging to: Rollins doing the spoken word thing

"IT'S BEEN A FAILURE" Retired US General Anthony Zinni: �It is part of your duty. Look, there is one statement that bothers me more than anything else. And that's the idea that when the troops are in combat, everybody has to shut up. Imagine if we put troops in combat with a faulty rifle, and that rifle was malfunctioning, and troops were dying as a result,� says Zinni. �I can't think anyone would allow that to happen, that would not speak up. Well, what's the difference between a faulty plan and strategy that's getting just as many troops killed? It�s leading down a path where we're not succeeding and accomplishing the missions we've set out to do.� FULL STORY Mike is blogging to: Da Moronics

From Mike Moore: "Hello from Cannes! I'm sure by now many of you have heard the good news - "Fahrenheit 9/11" has won the top prize at the Cannes Film Festival. It is the first time in nearly 50 years a documentary has won the Palme d'Or (the Golden Palm). Myself and twenty-six members of our crew are here in Cannes and we are in a state of shock. None of us expected this. First came the critics' reviews on Monday (The New York Times called it my best film ever), then the audience reaction at our premiere (a 20-minute standing ovation, a new all-time record for the festival), the International Federation of Film Critics Award on Friday, and then the best film prize last night. It's all been an incredible week for us and I can't wait to get back home and show you all this wonderfully powerful film we've made. No, we still don't have a distributor in America as I write this but after winning the world's top film prize I'd give it about one more day (if that) before we have someone brave enough (and smart enough) to show Americans what the world can already see (Albania, this week, became the final country - other than the U.S. - to sign on with a distributor). I am still hoping for a July release (4th of July weekend?) both in the U.S. and around the world. I fully expect the right wing and the Republican Party to come at me and this film with everything they've got. They will try, as they have unsuccessfully in the past, to attack me personally because they cannot win the debate on the issues the film raises - namely, that they are a pack of liars and the American people are on to them. And, if the early screenings of "Fahrenheit 9/11" are any indication, those who see this movie will never view the Bush administration in the same way again. Even if you already can't stomach George W. Bush & Co., I think this movie will take you to places you haven't gone before, with laughter and with tears. I will let you all know - as soon as we have a distributor - the date the film is opening. Until then, check out some of the articles that have been written, and check out the awards ceremony from Cannes. Thanks everyone for your support. Yours, Michael Moore mmflint@aol.com www.michaelmoore.com P.S. When you hear the wackos on Fox News and elsewhere refer to this prize as coming from "the French," please know that of the nine members of the Festival jury, only ONE was French. Nearly half the jury (four) were Americans and the President of the jury was an American (Quentin Tarantino). But this fact won't stop the O'Reillys or the Lenos or the Limbaughs from attacking the French and me because, well, that's how their simple minds function."

WEEKEND I am yawning into my coffee, Turbonegro is drowning out the construction noise and the cat is taking a crap and avoiding eye contact with me. Must be Monday. Friday night we saw Troy. Fucking awful. I am arguing exactly why over on The Napkin at the moment. Feel free to disagree. You are wrong. Saturday we stayed in bed. Saturday night we had Richard from Texas and PP over. Haven't posted on there for months and still they come... Second time we hung out with Richard. Nice guy. He's working in Soho turning David Beckham into Ren & Stimpy or something. 3D computer artist. Rewatched Donnie Darko. Eager to see the extended version. Sunday we did not a lot. Figuring it was a beautiful day and that every green space in London would be blighted by idiots we stayed in and had a movie day. Fuck the sun. Now I have a long list of people to chase down via email, some writing and editing to do and at some point I should probably look at the news. Michael Moore eh? I read a few right wing blog comments last night. The reaction of the right wing about his movie winning? It boiled down to the fact that he's fat, the French hate freedom, he's in league with the terrorists, France is in league with the terrorists and that his weight caused yesterday's airport disaster. Roll on November. Mike is blogging to: Turbonegro

THEM! I am in two minds about Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow. I should be excited as I love the old serials that provided the inspiration for this but the casting is horrible. Jude Law should be shot in the face. This article in The Guardian has ensured that I will see it though. I love this kind of madness: He decided he would be satisfied if he could create between 20 and 30 minutes of footage this way. After four years of working on it every day, he had six minutes last night I dreamt of giant ants. I hate Warren Ellis. That's what I get for reading the whole Planetary run straight through from the beginning... Mike is blogging to: Ministry

HOW WILL I KNOW HER? Baby pictures of me and my parents. I can't see them because they're in prison. Susan is my mum and I can't see her because she died in an accident. I was only little when she died so I can't remember her, so I ask my Grandad or my Uncle who I live with. My mum was 36 when she died and she is now 45. Leighanne and Georgia are my cousins. I am not allowed to see them because they are on my Dad's side and I am not allowed to see my Dad. How Will I Know Her? is a web-based exhibit about being far from the one you love, for reasons that are out of your control... Mike is blogging to: James

I THINK THEREFORE IIAM London is too hot already. I am already well into my summer sleep pattern. It's not like I sleep all winter to make up for the lack of sleep now... I need to move here: Svalbard would be a fun place to blog from... Mike is blogging to: nothing

NO DICE To all the people who keep emailing me to beg for a gmail invite: I already used them up on my friends. You can go offer to suck someone's dick on gmail swap and maybe someone will take pity on you. It pleases me to note that one of my gmail invites went out to Ethiopia and is now providing a wonderful stable service out there rather than sitting in the lap of some Bay Area techno junkie. Now fuck off and quit bothering me. Mike is blogging to: Bright Eyes

BACKGROUND HISS I am listening to my old vinyl after finally sorting it out over the weekend. Amazing what you find to do when you have a deadline hanging over you. I'd forgotten how annoying it was having to flip the damn things after six or so songs. I usually have an MP3 playlist that lasts for 24 hours... I remember we used to have a record player that allowed you to stack 10 LPs. After the first side of the first record was played out it dropped the second record down on top with a THUD and the sound of vinyl hitting spinning vinyl. Nasty. It also played havoc with the continuity when listening to concept albums. You are just about to find out what happened to Sister Mary on Operation: Mindcrime and then Voivod cuts in... The day is unwinding well. I just finished the first part of an interview with Henry Rollins and now have a bunch of other stuff to write up. Tanit sent me a link to a whole community set up around the Skin project. I haven't had time to read all the stuff on there but it seems a good place to hang if you are considering getting one of the remaining words inked on your body. Time to start thinking about lunch... Mike is Blogging to: Frank Zappa Live in Helsinki

BREAST STARING DETERRENT You can now get t shirts with movie trailers playing on them. Even being displayed on breasts fails to make I, Robot look interesting... Mike is blogging to: Sonic Youth

ROLLINS & MACKAYE RELEASE OLD DC STUFF Just arrived in my inbox: "I am happy to announce the start of a new CD label: District Line. The District Line label will focus on rare and unreleased music from the Washington DC area. It is a small label that resides under the umbrella of my company 2-13-61 Publications. A couple of years ago, it hit me that there was some really cool music from my hometown of Washington DC that was either out-of-print or unreleased and I should do something about that. Time to start a new label. I thought of NWCD as I am from the Northwest section of DC. I asked fellow NW DC resident and long time friend Ian MacKaye what he thought of the label name and he suggested District Line. I thought that sounded cool and the idea of it being Ian�s idea made it even better. We have two releases at once, here�s some information about them. Trouble Funk: Live & early Singles: It was with Ian, many years ago, that I first heard Trouble Funk. We were in Ian�s old Duster on Wisconsin Avenue, listening to WOL AM radio. A song by Trouble Funk called Pump Me Up was on and it was so great that we pulled over and just listened. It was like we had been waiting our whole lives to hear that beat. The dj back announced the band�s name and that was it, we were fans and the search was for their records was on. Several years ago, Rick Rubin and I had a label on Warner Bros. called Infinite Zero and we released the two Trouble Funk CDs in this set separately. The label went away and these great CDs went away as well. Music this good was made to be heard so here we are. Trouble can be considered one of DC�s foremost Go-Go funk bands. The Go-Go beat stands on its own. Nothing sounds like it and it belongs to Washington DC. Arguably, Go-Go�s elder statesman and acknowledged mainman is Chuck Brown who is still playing and still great. The singles and the live album in this set date back to the late 70�s and early 80�s. The live album is absolutely unimpeachable. If you can�t get to it, check yourself in. I bought the plain white sleeve double LP well over twenty years ago and it�s lost no speed whatsoever. "Trouble Funk Live. Straight Up Funk Go Go Style" is what is says on the label and that�s what you get here. One of the best bands in the country on a great night all the way live. The early singles are incredible, all of them collector�s items at this point, show the band going from strength to strength. They�re great but it�s the live show where Trouble Funk proves themselves to be undisputed heavyweight champions. :30 Over DC: :30 Over DC is a compilation record of DC area bands from the late 70�s that was released by Skip Groff who owned and operated the now legendary Yesterday & Today record store in Rockville Maryland. Skip had a label called Limp and he released a lot of cool local area bands and helped a lot of local musicians get their first records together. Look at the producer credits for the fist few Dischord releases and you�ll see Skip�s name. Anyway, this record was one of those cool LPs we all grew up with. One day I was talking to Skip about that record and what the deal was with it and a few weeks later, he sent me the masters and told me to do something with them. Sounded like a release to me. It features DC luminaries such as Half Japanese, The Slickee Boys and The Nurses. It�s a great slice of music and history. I sat on the tapes for about a year and at one point, I was at a wedding in DC and was talking to some Dischord types and told them about the tapes and my plans to perhaps some day release the record. They looked at me like I was nuts, "That record is so cool, you gotta put it out!" That was the shove I needed. Anyway, last year I worked back and forth with Skip on new liner notes and we got it together. I had it mastered by the great Phil Klum in NYC who specializes in old tape and it today, it came in. I just finished listening to it and it sounds great. We are lucky that the tapes held up, I was expecting some problems because of their age but we lucked out. I can�t wait to play a track off it tonight on the first broadcast of my radio show less than four hours from now. We are selling the District Line stuff at ten bucks. The Trouble CD is a double so that�s a pretty cool deal. My hope is that we break even and make enough to put out the next two projects we have lined up. If you feel adventurous and want to hear some cool stuff, please check these CDs out. We are really excited about this label. Like many CDs on 2-13-61, one dollar from each District Line release will be donated to a good organization. District Line being area-specific, the monies will be donated to DC area locations. I have not decided on the destinations of the contributions but I will when I have researched it and it shall be done. Like I said, this is a small label with an extremely limited scope. The primary interest is the only thing that counts: the music. As I told you in the other letter, I will be heading out for Kuwait and Iraq in a few days. I will get back at you and tell you what that was like when I am back in this damn office. Thanks for reading this. -- Henry" "30 Seconds Over DC" and Trouble Funk CDs available at: www.21361.com Henry Rollins in Iraq... there's a fun image. The CDs sound very cool and cheap as proverbial chips. I'm having me some of that. Mike is blogging to: Iggy Pop

BLAME ROHIT Surprisingly I am already getting positive feedback on the aborted weekend novel so maybe the aching wrists and bleeding fingertips were worth the effort after all. I'm not sure what to do with it next. Some of it is just awful and some of it is pretty good. I'm not sure whether I'll leave it be or salvage some of the better parts. If anything interesting comes of it I'll no doubt mention it here. Not sure if it will be excerpted anywhere else but if by the end of the month it's not going anywhere I'll try and remember to post some slices here or somewhere else. I am itching to get out today. Went a little stir crazy yesterday. The cat cannot carry a conversation. Of course today I have to stay in because I am waiting on someone... As soon as he has been and gone I head on out and go see what other people look like... Mike is blogging to: Kittie

POWELL FINDS HIS BALLS I had heard that Colin Powell was attempting to distance himself from the remarks he made to the UN last year about the reasons for going to war and then last night on News 24 I saw a report that he was mad as hell with just about everyone else in the Bush administration for allowing him to make such an arse of himself. It now looks like he is determined to put the record straight: "This is pretty unbelievable. Colin Powell's press aide attempted to put an early end to the interview by suddenly moving the camera away from Powell (right after Powell addresses the torture situation and right before Russert asks a hard-hitting question about the fake nigerian yellow cake WMD evidence he cited within his U.N. speech). Powell gets her out of the way somehow, manages to get the camera pointed in the right direction, and resumes the interview. You can hear him say "Emily, get out of the way."" You can download the clips here but here is a quick transcript: EMILY MILLER, STATE DEPARTMENT PRESS AIDE: You're off. SECRETARY POWELL: I am not off. EMILY MILLER, PRESS AIDE: No. They can't use it, they're editing it. SECRETARY POWELL: He's still asking the questions. EMILY MILLER, PRESS AIDE: He was not ... SECRETARY POWELL: Tim, I am sorry I lost you. MR. RUSSERT: I am right here Mr. Secretary. I would hope they would put you back on camera. I don't know who did that. EMILY MILLER, PRESS AIDE: He was going to go for another five minutes. SECRETARY POWELL: We've really scre... MR. RUSSERT: I think that was one of your staff Mr. Secretary. I don't think that's appropriate. SECRETARY POWELL: Emily, get out of the way. Bring the camera back please. (Camera returns to the interview subject) I think we're back on Tim, go ahead with your last question. (via boing boing) Corran also has an interesting Powell related post over on his site: Please let us suck your cock Mr.Powell...mmmmm *slurp slurp slurp* we're on your side ok? *slurvf slorp* can you shit on our chests again like you did last year? Mike is blogging to: Nation of Ulysses

14,984 I crashed out of the write-athon around 3pm yesterday just shy of the 20k mark. After tidying the thing up this morning it actually came in at a very underweight 14,984 words. All in all it wasn't too bad considering I spent a lot of Saturday cruising around in stolen cars, listening to Quiet Riot and shooting people in the face. Damn you GTA! I did a LOT of writing yesterday though. I must have taken a year of the keyboard's life expectancy. Back in the real world now though and I have way too many projects piled up and getting dusty so I'm moving up a gear. Yesterday we hooked up with Dais and Richard from Texas for drinks in The Intrepid Fox. Fun night. At some point this week we will check out Troy and although I've been told it's not as bad as expected I still have very low hopes... Also, my friend Miguel who is a hell of a composer is now available for freelance work and commissions. Check out his site and drop him a line. That's all I've got at the moment. More later. Mike is blogging to: dusty old vinyl

JOIN THE ARMY I've had an advance copy of this for a while now and it is on HEAVY rotation. Do yourselves a favour and give it a click. Mike is blogging to: Take a wild fucking guess

HEIL PHOTOSHOP I just saw this over on Boing Boing: Oh those funny right wing guys... Here's a quick response: Now quit distracting me - I have a masterpiece to finish. Mike is blogging to: Fugazi

MUST TRY HARDER The GREAT MAHAKALI WRITE-A-THALON website is back up with a slightly different URL. I have had a morning of interruptions due to the incredible number of people deciding to call on me today. That's it though. The phone is off the hook and the door is locked. I am woefully behind but am full of soup and coffee and ready to get my head down for a few solid hours... More later. Mike is blogging to: nothing

THE OLD APOCALYPTIC PUNK SCI FI HORROR WESTERN PLOT So a few people have asked me what kind of plot I will be tackling tomorrow. My first response was 'I need a plot?' but now I have one thanks to the good people over at 2000AD. There you can find Alec Trench's Thrill Pitcher which gave me this: I think this scenario has legs. It won't please the Paul Auster fans out there but if you've read Mark Manning or Mick Farren you should hopefully crack a smile at my effort. Frank Sinatra fans should also pay attention. Come Monday I'll stick the (fingers crossed) finished atrocity up online somewhere. Mike is blogging to: Three Colours Red

FOOT ON THE PEDAL I am gearing up towards this weekend's write-a-thalon. The official website is down at the moment - I know it has been getting an increasing amount of traffic but fingers crossed it will be back later today. You can always email Rohit Gupta directly. The idea is to begin writing tomorrow morning at 9am and stop Sunday evening at 7pm. By that time you should have a completed novel (a trim 35,000 words), screenplay (80 pages) or epic poem or comic book etc. I know at least one author who will be writing and drawing a complete comic book over the weekend. I'll blog updates as I go (probably in despair and panic) and can be annoyed via email or messenger. I only get to hang with Jess at the weekends so I won't be putting any specific time aside for this because she's more important. So I'll probably take in a couple of movies along the way and wander around London if the weather is nice. To compensate I won't be sleeping much. I have assembled the things I NEED to get through the weekend: 1. Lots and lots of coffee. 2. My Tare Panda mug to briefly hold said coffee before it hits my system. 3. A pre-formulated playlist of noisy music. 4. A pizza delivery menu. 5. A baseball for throwing at mental blocks and 6. A baseball mitt for catching rebounds. I just need a couple of bowls of MnMs and I am all set. Because Rohit's site was down I googled the comp to see what the buzz was and pleased to see it's generated a lot of interest. This is from Fast Fiction: "This is why it is special. It started as a mere weekend binge between four friends. Now, scores of writers from more then seven countries including India, the United States, Norway, Ireland, and Japan, will each attempt to write an entire novel, poetic epic, stage or screen play, from scratch. They have a weekend --58 hours, to be exact. This includes heavyweights like Tom Bradley in Nagasaki, and Mike Atherton in London..." For the record I'm not a heavyweight - I'm just big boned. Mike is blogging to: L7

CATCH UP Been a busy week. Jess is still enjoying the job so that's good. We saw a bunch of bands and fitting those around a 9-5 lifestyle all of a sudden takes a little getting used to. Good fun though. Fiery Furnaces were ok, Jess loves them but I find them annoying after a while. Therapy? were stuck in a support slot the other night to The Wildhearts who sucked beyond belief. Andy and the boys were in good form though and back to a three piece. Also took in some metal nostalgia and saw WASP play the Astoria. Blackie looks a little worse for wear these days but they still put on a good show. Apart from that it's website stuff, magazine stuff, GTA: Vice City (for me) and The Sims (for Jess). Today is the last day with our builder/painter chap and the flat looks fantastic. Still need to get some new blackout blinds up to defeat the evil sun but I'm seeing a guy on Friday morning about just that. Also beginning to warm to the idea of a weekend away... Mike is blogging to: The Clash

REDUCE WEIGHT FAST It takes less than a minute to cut off a human head. Salon have the video of Nick Berg being decapitated here. 5 minute video - four minutes of the masked guys reading their statement and less than sixty seconds to get the head off and up. Interesting and a little grim but to be perfectly honest worse things happen every day to pigs and cows. Animals are cuter and are smart enough NOT to jump on a plane to do their "patriotic duty". Salon goes on to say that "you feel as if you know Nick Berg intimately, that you've perhaps known him your whole life". Well, yeah. I've known a lot of idiots. Sad to say that most of them are still walking around. Fuck Berg and fuck the idiots who let this story detract from the fact that America and the UK had no right to go out there in the first place. If you're pissed off that too many fuckwits are dying then you should be angry not with the people picking them off but with the arrogant leaders that sent them out there and still refuse to leave. Sticking your hand in a hornet's nest and then complaining about getting stung is stupid. Mike is blogging to: Ozzy/Kim Basinger/Was Not Was - Shake Your Head

OOPS All my little interweb pies got knocked off the windowsill yesterday leaving me with nothing to finger. A combination of too much bandwidth, not enough steam and a small controlled explosion. Normal blogging will resume shortly. Mike is blogging to: Therapy?

BLOGGER REDESIGN Blogger had an overhaul this weekend and added a bunch of new bells and whistles. I'm going to test run the comments feature for the next day or so to see how it works out. Feel free to add your ten cents below. PS The Blogger spellcheck still fails to recognise the word 'blogger'. Mike is blogging to: The Misfits

THE GREAT MAHAKALI WRITE-A-THALON I'll catch up with all the other stuff later. For now though you need to go here I'm not the only one crazy enough to try and write a novel in a weekend. Send an email to Rohit now and get involved. Mike is blogging to: The Misfits

AMERICANS HAVE ALL THE FUN Register for the draft early and pick your postmortem preference now! Mike is blogging to: Therapy?

IS RUSH EVEN A REAL NAME? Rush Limbaugh on torture of Iraqis: U.S. guards were "having a good time... it looks just like anything you'd see Madonna, or Britney Spears do on stage" from Media Matters MIKE is blogging to: Therapy?

TEEN'S BUSH I've 'comforted' a few teenage girls in my time too but I didn't have the safety of the free world to deal with as well. What a guy! Bush pauses to comfort teen Id vote for him. No seriously... he's like a warm uncle in a cold bed. 'Dad' to the Western world or evil crazy fuck up - you decide Mike is blogging to: Therapy?

Shy Girl Not what you think Mike is blogging to: the smell of burning pies

IS THERE A CRACKWHORE IN THE HOUSE Corran has a gig for you: What we need is for some young intern to give G.W. a late-night blowjob. That'll get his ass in the hot-seat. All these human rights and Geneva convention violations don't mean shit. Get Justin Timberlake to rip G.W's shirt open and expose his hairy wart nipple. Then that bastard will feel the wrath of his people. But this is just a dream...Christ, where would you find the crackwhore who's fucked up enough to suck on that roach...what kind of cleaning fluid would you need to inject into her to keep her alive long enough to get the bastard hard, and then spit some of his rotten spunk on her dress, then kill her before she realises what she did...Then again, maybe Justin would do it for us. Mike is blogging to: nothing

"NO DIFFERENT FROM SHOOTING A TURKEY" Profile of one of the soldiers photographed torturing Iraqi prisoners and the mentality of the town she grew up in: "A lot of people here think they ought to just blow up the whole of Iraq," via Boing Boing Mike is blogging to: X

TRAPPED I have been forced to relocate to the spare bedroom with the cat while the remainder of the house is repainted. This has played havoc with my plans but thanks to wireless I can still surf and annoy people. Coran reminded me why I love Donald Rumsfeld: "It is an exceptional, isolated, we hope, an isolated case. And our country is our country and it is a wonderful country." That's that cleared up then. In a way I hope that Bush is reelected. That way there will be years of more protests like this one: Stolen from Freon who found it on mobog. I need a new phone. I am underwhelmed at the thought of seeing The Fiery Furnaces this evening at The Scala. I hate the venue and the band irritates me yet somehow this will be the third time I have seen them... I am old. Mike is blogging to: The Mekons

INGEREED Mike is blogging to: Bobby Conn

BBC MARK Inger is on the BBC: Expect him to be co-hosting Newsnight in the near future "You're a big Paxman , but you're out of shape. With me it's a full time job. Now behave yourself." Mike is blogging to: The Misfits

"M.I. WANTED TO GET THEM TO TALK" If anyone is still under the misconception that the nasty shit going on in Iraqi prisons was just bored soldiers having a laugh at the expense of their prisoners: "Do you really believe the Army relieved a general officer because of six soldiers?" Mike is blogging to: nothing

AVOID THE INTELLECTUAL ROUTE Robert and Sch�n Passmore took their children to Disney World last fall and left bitterly disappointed. As Christians who reject evolutionary theory, the family scoffed at the park's dinosaur attractions, which date the apatosaurus, brachiosaurus and the like to prehistoric times. "My kids kept recognizing flaws in the presentation," said Mrs. Passmore, of Jackson, Ala. "You know � the whole `millions of years ago dinosaurs ruled the earth' thing." So this week, the Passmores sought out a lower-profile Florida attraction: Dinosaur Adventure Land, a creationist theme park and museum here that beckons children to "find out the truth about dinosaurs" with games that roll science and religion into one big funfest with the message that Genesis, not science, tells the real story of the creation. Kent Hovind, the minister who opened the park in 2001, said his aim was to spread the message of creationism through a fixture of mainstream America � the theme park � instead of pleading its case at academic conferences and in courtrooms. Mr. Hovind, a former public school science teacher with his own ministry, Creation Science Evangelism, and a hectic lecture schedule, said he had opened Dinosaur Adventure Land to counter all the science centers and natural history museums that explain the evolution of life with Darwinian theory. There are dinosaur bone replicas, with accompanying explanations that God made dinosaurs on Day 6 of the creation as described in Genesis, 6,000 years ago. Among the products the park gift shop peddles are T-shirts with a small fish labeled "Darwin" getting gobbled by a bigger fish labeled "Truth." "There are a lot of creationists that are really smart and debate the intellectuals, but the kids are bored after five minutes," said Mr. Hovind, who looks boyish at 51 and talks fast. "You're missing 98 percent of the population if you only go the intellectual route." The theme park is just the latest approach to promoting creationism outside the usual school curriculum route, which Mr. Hovind and others see as important, but too limited and not sufficiently appealing to modern young families. Creationist groups are also promoting creationist vacations, including dinosaur digs in South Dakota, fossil-collecting trips in Australia and New Zealand, and tours of the Grand Canyon ("raft the canyon and learn how Noah's flood contributed to the formation"). Dan Johnson, an assistant manager of the park, said there were also creationism-themed cruises, with lectures on the subject amid swimming and shuffleboard. A Kentucky creationist group called Answers in Genesis says it is building a 100,000-square-foot complex outside Cincinnati with a museum, classrooms, a planetarium and a special-effects theater where moviegoers can experience the flood and other events described in Genesis. Ken Ham, the group's chief executive, said marketing surveys suggested that the complex would draw not just home-schooling families and other creationists, but mainstream church groups and curiosity seekers. Mr. Ham said a former Universal Studios art director was designing exhibits for the complex, including dioramas of Adam and Eve and a model of Noah's Ark. The complex will open in 2006 at the earliest, Mr. Ham said. At Dinosaur Adventure Land, visitors can make their own Grand Canyon replica with sand and read a sign deriding textbooks for teaching that the Colorado River formed the canyon over millions of years: "This is clearly not possible. The top of the Grand Canyon is 4,000 feet higher than where the river enters the canyon! Rivers do not flow up hill!" There is a movie depicting the creation, the flood and the fall of man, which fast-forwards from a lush Garden of Eden to a New York City traffic jam. There are no mechanized rides at Dinosaur Adventure Land � no creationist-themed roller coasters, scramblers or even a ferris wheel � but instead, a simple discovery center and museum and about a dozen outdoor games, each of which has a "science lesson" and "spiritual lesson" posted nearby. A group of about 60 parents and home-schooled children who visited Wednesday, including the Passmores, spent all afternoon trying the games, which promote religious faith more than creationist tenets. Mike is blogging to: Rod and Todd clapping with joy and speaking in tongues

I'VE MOVED My new gmail address is now my main email address. Change your address books accordingly. Mike is blogging to: Angelfish

LOOKING EAST We want to express our regret to chickens for having to kill them, while also giving thanks to them for providing us with food. Hideyuki Shimada, director of the Japan Poultry Association, at a memorial service to honor the thousands of chickens killed in the wake of the bird flu outbreak. Mike is blogging to: Disturbed

AFTERNOON OF THE LEPUS Doc is making me choke on coffee again: Glove Game This game involves my workmate donning a leather glove in such a way that *one* of the fingers is *not* inside it's corresponding glove-hole. My job is then to guess - through visual detection alone - which of the glove-fingers does not contain an actual finger. There is no time limit, so I may take as much time as I need. When I have made my conclusions I then squeeze the chosen glove-finger in order to reveal whether it is hollow and lifeless or filled with a real, working human finger! If incorrect, the player wearing the glove (this is Chris) then bends back the 'fake' finger in such a way that would be physically impossible for a real finger to bend. Thus proving that it is indeed a non-finger-containing glove-finger. Strangely enough, though we have played this game many, many times, I have never ever won. Not even once. Consequently, I have never got to wear the glove myself. He has also taken to wearing a bunny suit He will be wearing it on stage this weekend. I should take a camera. Mike is blogging to: Jess would hit me if I told you